Firefly Serenity

“Love. Can know all the math in the ‘verse but take a boat in the air that you don’t love? She’ll shake you off just as sure as a turn in the worlds. Love keeps her in the air when she oughtta fall down…tell you she’s hurtin’ ‘fore she keens…makes her a home.”

Lovers and Haters

The word “hater” has become a cool word these days.   We can trace it back to Middle English so it’s no surprise really that it was used in England in the 60’s.  But I was surprised when it jumped out at me recently.  This is one of the reasons I love Steve Marriott.  Loved all the haters.  I’ve got a long way before I’m that mad, Goddess help me get there sooner in my heart.

Mad John

There was an old man that lived in the greenwood
Nobody knew him or what he had done
But mothers would say to their children, “Beware of Mad John.”

John would sing with the birds in the morning
Laugh with the wind in the cold hand of night
But people from behind their curtains, said he’s not quite right.

John had it sussed he was living the life of a tramp
Yes his bed was the cold and the damp but the sun was his friend
He was free

So here was a wise one who loved all the haters
He loved them so much that their hate turned to fear
And shaking from behind their curtains the loved ones would hear.

Agora

Can hardly wait.  My High Priest says he can’t bear to go because he chained himself to the books when they burned, whenever and by whoever that was.  That he can’t bear to relive it.  I can hardly blame him.  It’s going to be hard to watch, it’s brutal.  But a stunning epic none the less.  There are four theories. What is true?  I don’t know that we know.  The Burning of Alexandria.

The timing of the debut isn’t lost on me.

The Song Will Sing Itself

This will be a smooth, easy, and graceful week for you — if, that is, you get yourself out of the way and allow the universe to do its job. Can you do that? It doesn’t mean you should be passive or blank. On the contrary, in order for the cosmos to perform its magic, you should be on the lookout for what captivates your imagination and be primed to jump when life says “jump!” Be both relaxed and alert; receptive and excitable; surrendered to the truth and in intimate contact with your primal power. Then the song will sing itself. The dream will interpret itself. The beauty will reveal itself.

I love this, especially the bit about the song singing itself….  Indeed it should.  So I think I’ll let it.

Bit and pieces of life

• My brother went into a complete tailspin after threatening to sue me after reading my post where I said I didn’t want to play with him any more.  It got so bad that he was calling my parents every day in a complete tirade, made my mother cry.  That was that.  I wrote him and said something along the lines of “Dude, chill.  Breathe.  Go be happy.  We will never fix decades of problems overnight. I love you.”  He wrote back saying thanks and all has been quiet ever since.
• The job got a bit crazy last week.  It’s just always busy, co-worker behaving in very unprofessional ways (turns out this is normal, she is tolerated due to her longevity, historial knowledge, and mad skillz), that I got cranky.  After a weekend of self-examination I decided that while I’m grateful and am not ever leaving until there is something else of substance waiting for me, I will at some point move on.  Until then I am going to be militantly cheerful.
• Home life starting to swing again. After the episode of violence with Dad he calmed down eventually and things got pretty normal around here. No more blood sugar crises, no outburts, almost back to normal.  Until yesterday.  Now he’s all confused, his behavior is erratic if pleasant with grumpy face, he doesn’t know what the heck is going on.  Hose running outside with the front door wide open while he chats amiably with a neighbor as our precious and expensive resources just go off into the good and cool night.  Using the hose to flush the internal vacuum system.  Here we go again.  It’s never going to get better than this and I’m certain that the episodes will become more and more frequent.  Let’s hope they are not as extreme as they were that day since we are no longer trying to get him to stop driving.  He promised the cops and that’s a promise he’ll keep.
• Projects are easing back into my life. Knitted socks for Yule presents, a felted zipper pouch with embroidery (another Yule gift), a tarot bag for a vampire deck for Lewis who cuts my hair who I adore, and a reproduction Roumanian peasant blouse (white linen with red embroidery, seam details, and crocheted neckline and sleeve hem).  I want to make a black wool cloak as well as a black robe.  I have the later but it’s really just a loose long black dress/tunic.  Hekates night inspired me to do something for her for that night of the year and other occassions when it’s called for.  I actually have the fabric, brought it with me, one of the few things I did that showed a view into what I would need this year (or two).
• It’s dark at 5:10 now.  Wow. Yule approacheth and that doesn’t seem half weird right now.  I feel as though I’ve missed an entire year of my life.

Life is good.  Really good. Car is saved, bills are paid, family is well enough and the drama has declined, I feel like an adult again, kitty won’t come out from under the bed much which concerns me a bit but what can you do.

Keeping it simple.

No No Keshagesh

Oooh, So Many Wonderful Favorite Elements

Can hardly wait…

The Week In Cancer

Pregnant women sometimes have unusual cravings. From the fourth to sixth month of her daughter’s gestation period, for example, my friend Marta was on occasion beset by the longing to eat toothpaste. I’ve known other women who fantasized about nibbling on mud, coffee grounds, and chalk. Fortunately, they all resisted the urge, which is what health practitioners recommend. Instead they tried to figure out if their bodies were trying to tell them about some legitimate deficiency of vitamins or minerals. I offer this to you as a metaphor to keep in mind. As your own special creation ripens, you may experience odd desires. Don’t necessarily take them at face value.

 

Well darn, I was hoping to eat chalk.  Or have sex.  I dunno.  Guess I don’t get to give in to the urge…

Samhain Percolations

Our coven celebrated Samhain on Wednesday night. It was the full moon too but the group conscience says that we never mix a full moon with Samhain. We concentrate fully on the Sabbat.

I made a special dish, which I highly recommend, perfect for Samhain and those who are especially connected to Hekate. Chopped hard boiled eggs with mayo and pepper on the bottom layer, sweet onions (saved the walla walla’s for this), cream cheese and sour cream, topped with black caviar. You can take chopped parsley and “frost” the sides too but I didn’t. All Her favorites. Black, white, eggs, onions. Served on crackers, it was delicious. Spendy but I wanted to celebrate all the abundance that I’ve received of late.

Everyone brought their divination tools. Before hand we were drawing cards and ogham sticks and I was getting some really great stuff. Pulled the 9 of cups from my High Priest’s deck. Niiiiice.

We had the ancestor altar and a large dumb supper. I had remembered to bring two photos because I printed them off at work and completely forgot the photos of my ancestors. So I had the photo of me and Joel and one of Steve Marriott. LMAO. I figured that my ancestors were close enough and I did got messages from all of them. But I got a lot of stuff from Joel and Steve. What was really weird is that folks kept saying things that were titles and lyrics from S.M.’s songs, including one of my favorite love songs, Say No More. It was a little uncanny after awhile.

During the ritual we had a lot of drumming and rattles and singing and dancing, really frikking cool, the coolest ever. The God took each of us to the divination corner one at a time while this was going on. I did a brief grounding and meditation, talked to Joel and Steve (and Alva and Lou and Nana and Beebo and Grandpa Uncle Bill), pulled some cards from my DruidCraft deck. Thanks guys, that about sums it up. Smiled my ass off. Suffice it to say that I got a lot of high cup cards that night. Went back to the group, picked up my rattle, and tranced out and yet remained fully there.

Asked an ancestor that was of my blood to show up. I’m adopted so all my ancestors are not of the blood. I was curious who might be connected to me in that way. And I got some voodoo queen, all caribbean, rattles and snakes and fire and blood and rum, Papa Legba and Urzulie. Extremely interesting images and energy. How frikking cool and very curious since my Mom’s family is from Kingston Barbados. Perhaps, blood or no blood, they are still my ancestors.

And I said a long and heartfelt goodbye to Joel, thanked him again for all the good. Asked him to send me someone to love who had many of his qualities and who would be a strong love like ours but without the drunkeness and womanizing. *wink*

It has to be the best ritual I’ve ever attended. I’ve attended a few Samhains that have knocked my socks off, my favorite sabbat of all, but this one was just amazing. I can’t even tell you about the drawing down the goddess part. Really, I can’t even tell you. Holy Mother, it was astonishing though.

So, tonight I’m gonna boogie til the rooster crows or I turn into a pumpkin…

Halloween ~ Too Commercialized?

Credit where Credit is due

I have the best boss ever. Really and truly. Go to great lengths to make her happy. My dad asked me the other day what it was she did that warranted such praise. It made me pause to realize that it was simply because she says things like Thank You and I Love How You Organize Everything. Wow, a kind and communicative human being. How sad that they are so rare in overseers that it’s something to be grateful for. But grateful I am.

Then I recalled our meeting that morning. We receive several letters and phone calls every day from people with desperate stories about loved ones dealing with Borderline Personality Disorder and suicide. The stories are truly heartbreaking. I found several my first week that were several months old. And when MML and I went over them her distress at how these had fallen through my predessors fingers, how late we were, and how much she wanted to help them, really touched my heart.

The Worst Boss I Ever Had worked with and did research on the disabled. His own son was terribly physically disabled. The day he found out I had fibromyalgia he said to me that if he had known that when he interviewed me he never would have hired me. It was that statement that I believe sealed his fate when I filed a claim with the state for benefits based on a hostile work enviornment.

To be working with such a wonderful and truly caring indivdual is so welcome.